Of Unanimous Petitions

Just a little warm-up for tonight...

Dear Mayor:

I have three petitions to bring before you this evening.

Each is signed UNANIMOUSLY by 10 affected citizens. In the case of petition 2, all are residents on the affected street.

Based on the fact that the residents of O'Day street won your heartfelt approval at the last council meeting based on their unanimity, we are certain you will vote in our favor based on our unanimity.

Petition 1:

Whereas, it is apparent from the last meeting that you have no idea where you are spending city $'s for the Brookview street reconstruction (Where is O'Day, anyway?). Be it resolved that you should get out and about on occasion and figure out where stuff is beyond the streets between your lovely castle and your mighty throne at City Hall.

Petition 2:

Whereas the residents of O'Day street thought they had cornered the market on NIMBYness. Be it resolved that all of the residents on Sterling Street wish to close off THIER street and force all of the traffic on to O'Day street. There may be more residents on O'Day. But we feel unanimously that we are better and therefore do not need the extra hassle of sharing neighborhood traffic.

Petition 3:

I leave this one for last as it precludes you from taking care of the other two...

Whereas we have a group of 10 citizens who are concerned about the direction of the city. Be it resolved that the 10 petitioners would like you and your two other open-meeting-law-violating loopy-city-manager-2-AM-hiring selves to resign effective immediately so we can have our city back.


Thanks for your votes!