The Gnomes of Maplewood

Watching the city council at their meetings, I often find myself imagining them as caricatures. Somehow Diana Longrie and Rebecca Cave -- especially Cave -- keep looking to me like some kind of gnomes. "According to myth," says the Wikipedia, "gnomes hoarded secret knowledge just as they hoarded treasure." This reminds us of Longrie's twin obsessions with saving money (not always successfully) and getting her hands on all information available (by, for example, sending her Gnome-in-Waiting, Copeland, to pilfer it from the city clerk's office -- though I'm sure the Tolkien fans out there will tell me this was a job for a hobbit burglar, not a gnome). On the other hand, Cave's painted-on look of alertness and smiles would be right at home on a porcelain sentry, protecting a surburban garden from nefarious squirrels or what have you.

As for tending Maplewood's own garden, the big news on Monday night was the dismissal of HR director Sherrie Le. It's a little hard to keep track, but I think we now have...

• - Interim City Manager
• - No Assistant City Manager
• - Interim City Attorney
• - No HR Director
• - Interim Community Development Director
• - A police chief ready to jump to another city

I think the strategy is becoming clear -- it's a variation on the famous South Park Underpants Gnomes Business Plan:

• Phase 1: Fire or drive away everyone in City Hall.
• Phase 2: ???
• Phase 3: Good government!
  

It's not very good as plans go, but at least we've known what they're up to. To quote the Pioneer Press, 4/8/06, regarding the firing of former City Manager Richard Fursman: "Council Member Erik Hjelle said if it were possible, he also would seek to remove the city's human resources director, finance director and police and fire chiefs." Two down, three to go.

We can only hope that after emptying city hall of its staff, the council will do us the favor of firing themselves en masse, and at least giving us the hope of an interim mayor and council to start cleaning up the mess.